I'm laying out at the pool yesterday ( don't worry, I was covered in SPF 55 sunscreen and my incision was covered)with a friend. My phone rang and I knew immediately it was Carle. It was a 326 prefix.
I tried to excuse myself to a corner for some privacy and maybe a relief from the Jamming house music playing at full blast on the radio behind me. I took a deep breath. Hello?
Surgery has been scheduled for 9:30AM on Thursday September 22nd at the Carle's SurgiCenter in Champaign. I'll have a consult and then the surgery. All together at once. The scheduler told me my surgeon's name but I couldn't hear it over Brittany on the radio. She's sending me surgery prep papers. If the doctor's name isn't on there, I'll call and ask. I know so many of you have been so wonderful and helpful and have asked.
Brian has already taken that day and the next off. I told him I needed him to drive me and take care of me that day but I would be fine the next. Its just my chest. Its not like I won't be able to walk or something. But he insisted and its done and I'm again so grateful for the love of My Brian! I think he knows me enough that although I may be ready physically, there will be an emotional component to it all too.
Its a long ways off. September 22nd is 37 days away ( but who's counting). My best friend however told me that perhaps its good news and lessens my burden some to know that if Pathology thought it was a crisis, It would be in sooner. True. I'm finding comfort in that.
I just feel like I have poison in me. I hate it. I just want this dug out of me, give me a huge scar with lots of scary stitches and let me move on.