While away for Brian's grandma's funeral, we stayed in a hotel. Mara didn't get to nap for 4 days and it was showing. Both of the kids had done amazingly well but we were all tired and cranky. Tuesday afternoon, we snuggled into our hotel room in our PJ's ( or in Mara's case, undies) and just watched TV and relaxed. It was much needed. I asked to snuggle with Amara. As she's gotten older she's a pretty great snuggler but she's so busy...it usually doesn't last long. But this time we were watching a show together. She was still. And quiet. And eventually, I felt her begin to twitch. I asked Brian is she was asleep and when he confirmed yes, I immediately started crying.
I was overcome with emotion by this one precious moment. Since birth, this little bundle of love has not allowed me to rock her to sleep or hold her for extended periods of time. Her colicky turned strong willed personality didn't allow it-ever. Really. I know this is hard to believe but she wasn't the baby you gently rocked until drowsy and carefully placed in her crib. She was the kind of baby who you tried to rock but she was too pissed in her swaddle to move and screamed or fussed or moved or wiggled. She was the baby and toddler and preschooler, you occassionally just had to dump and run and let her cry it out because there was no other option.
This moment became extra precious to me. I asked Brian to take a picture. Not only to document it for you all but so I could see too. I couldn't see her face by the way I was holding her and God forbid I move her.
I held her for a long time. Gently carressing her hair and loving ever second, tears streaming down my cheeks.
When I had to wake her, she woke in a good mood and we were able to continue our wonderful day together. What a special memory. For me.